It's bad enough to feel awful and fed up with your appearance. The numbers on the scale seem stuck at some awful number you can't get below and none of the stores seem to carry your size.

It's awful.

So you decide to do something about it. You join a gym or sign up for a class. Yet even though you're making a change for the better, things aren't any easier. It's a struggle to get back in shape. You can barely keep up. You're out of breath and feel discouraged.

And instead of words of encouragement or advise, you are criticized. I'm not talking about the constructive kind. I'm talking about what basically amounts to bullying.

I've heard people say, "Fat people at the gym make me sick." "If I see one more fatty sweating like a pig at the gym I think I'm going to throw up." "Why can't the fat, disgusting people be forced to work out at 2 a.m.?" I could go on, but I'm sure you get the idea.

It's bad enough when "lay" people make comments like that, but it might be worse when someone who calls themselves a professional does it. When you go to a personal trainer, gym instructor, etc. you hope you get someone who will help you get back on track and work your way up to where more fit students are. Yet instead, too often I find "professionals" who are rude, impatient, and downright insulting.

Most of the time, they don't have the courage to insult you to your face. You either overhear them complaining about you to other students or they're referring to someone else (which is still insulting because if the other person is just as overweight as I am, you are really referring to me as well).

I have found that very few people have successfully lost weight in response to insults and criticism. Anyone that I personally know who lost the weight and are still keeping it off made it there through a good deal of positive reinforcement and support from others in addition to their own efforts.