Words

I find it very frustrating when people tell me I'm not trying. I usually hear this from people who have never struggled with weight gain. They're the kids that were always picked first in gym class, always wore the latest fashions, always had a boyfriend/girlfriend. The hardest thing they seemed to struggle with was finding time to go to all the parties they were invited to.

This may sound like jealousy but that's not what's going on here. I just feel that if you haven't gone through what I am going through, then you don't have any reason to criticize. Would it be fair for a man or a woman who hasn't had children criticize a woman in labor for screaming too much? Or, would it be fair for a person who has two healthy parents to criticize someone who recently lost both parents that they are grieving too much? Of course not. Both would be ridiculous. So why is it okay to insult me?

It's hard enough to struggle with not being able to sleep because you're stomach is growling and exercising with 60, 70, or 80 extra pounds on your body (just imagine trying to do aerobics with a backpack full of books on), and then having to face the scale and seeing that you've gained instead of lost. Imagine being called lazy, sloppy, gross, disgusting, nauseating, a pig, a slob, and so on for years on end and knowing that all those insults would stop if you could just lose the weight. Every day that I get out of bed, I am reminded of what I am and what I'm not. Having to look in the mirror and seeing what I see is torture. It seems only to get worse than better.

So if you're reading this and have never battled significant weight gain, please remember that the words you speak can stay with someone for the rest of their lives. So why not make them positive?